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the simple lining
Phil Kaye & Sarah Kay // Origin Story
Sarah Kay: It started with a sweater.
Phil Kaye: I was looking incredibly fly. First day of college orientation as a freshman... plus, I'm the type of guy who's always trying to make a good impression.
Sarah: He looked like a tool. And it's the first week of school, so I've got people to meet and things to try. I don't have time to waste on this guy loitering backstage at a talent show.
Phil: It started with a freshman talent show, a chance to showcase what I know about spoken word and poetry and try and get some people to notice me.
Sarah: It started with a technical difficulty -
Phil: some sort of delay -
Sarah: somebody's iPod track wouldn't play.
Phil: So I'm stuck waiting backstage when I notice this girl -
Sarah: and he walks over, stupid sweater and all. There was nowhere to run, backstage was too small.
Phil: And I'm so nervous about going onstage, I decide to strike up a conversation.
Sarah: Oh, sorry, I completely got ahead of myself. I totally skipped introductions. My name is Sarah Kay.
Phil: My name is Phil Kaye. I'm from California -
Sarah: born and raised in NYC.
Phil: Let's see, fun fact about me -
Both: My mom is Japanese and my dad is Jewish.
Sarah: Not a common combination, but I think it's kinda cute. People call me Japajew -
Phil: Jewpanese -
Sarah: Ashkenazi kamikaze.
Phil: And come December -
Both: Hanukkah and Christmas!
Sarah: Plus, you should taste my mother's brisket. Jan has matzah ball soup with noodles...brings my father Jeffrey to his knees.
Phil: It took mom and dad to raise this lanky, cock-eyed, half-breed.
Sarah: Well, I think that's it. My mom, my dad, and me - oh, plus my little brother. He's eighteen.
Phil: My little sister is a deadpan firecracker. She's only eighteen, but she keeps me on track. Her name is Sarah.
Sarah: My little brother's name is Phillip.
Both: Anyway.
Sarah: Where was I?
Phil: It started with a backstage interaction.
Sarah: No, it started with a backward first impression.
Phil: Okay, well, I'll tell you where it didn't start. It didn't start at fifth grade summer camp.
Sarah: That's true, it did not start at junior lifeguards. Even though we were both there.
Phil: Matching red bathing suits, white t-shirts, visors, and our counsellor -
Both: Mr. Johnson.
Sarah: Who probably figured that the shy girl in his morning class -
Phil: and the skinny kid in his afternoon class -
Both: were... cousins?!
Sarah: Probably thought we carpooled over together -
Phil: in between family photoshoots and fourth of July barbecues.
Sarah: But instead, we merely co-existed -
Phil: almost met but always missed it -
Sarah: spinning around like two sides of a coin.
Phil: Look!
Both: We've done the research!
Sarah: And we swear, we're not related.
Phil: And we've never dated.
Both: And we're never... EVER... going to.
Phil: Because what are the chances of finding someone with your last name -
Sarah: Japanese and Jewish with siblings called the same?
Phil: What are the odds of finding someone -
Sarah: who can finish your sentences -
Phil: who will let you cut in line -
Sarah: who knows not to just lend a hand, or an ear when you need them to give you their spine -
Phil: who is woman enough to be best man at your wedding -
Sarah: who will keep every secret, save every letter, tell you how you really look -
Phil: who will remember every single one of your birthdays -
Sarah: without checking Facebook?
Phil: What are the odds of finding someone who knows your poetry by heart -
Sarah: who won't freak out if you're hanging out and accidentally fart?
Phil: Yeah. If you have a date and you need to look fresh, I will let you borrow my hair products.
Sarah: And if you don't have a date and you need to look fresh, I will let you borrow... my cousin.
Phil: I will always see you for the alley-oop.
Sarah: I will always save you a seat.
Phil: I will always pick you to be my partner even though you are terrible at handball.
Sarah: When the fire takes all you have, my home will be your home.
Phil: When you are old and can no longer remember my face, I will meet you for the first time again and again.
Sarah: When they make fun of your accent, I will take you swimming because we all sound the same underwater.
Phil: When Ellis Island tries to erase your past, I will call you by your real name.
Sarah: When they call your number for the draft, I will enlist to fight beside you.
Phil: And I will march with you from Selma to Montgomery and back as many times as it takes.
Sarah: We will stand together against the hoses and the dogs -
Both: because it didn't start with us.
Phil: It started with Lennon and McCartney.
Sarah: It started with Thelma and Louise.
Phil: It started with Winnie-the-Pooh and Christopher Robin.
Sarah: Bert and Ernie!
Phil: Abbott and Costello!
Sarah: Rosencrantz and Guildenstern!
Phil: Mario and Luigi!
Sarah: Watson and Sherlock!
Phil: Pikachu and Charizard! And they could tell you what a miracle this is.
Sarah: They could tell you how rare this is.
Phil: But they could tell you how rare friendship always is.
Sarah: The chances are slim.
Phil: The cards are always stacked against you, the odds are always low.
Both: But I have seen the best of you, and the worst of you, and I choose both.
Phil: I want to share every single one of your sunshines and save some for later.
Sarah: I will tuck them into my pockets so I can give them back to you when the rains fall hard.
Both: Friend -
Phil: I want to be the mirror that reminds you to love yourself.
Sarah: I want to be air in your lungs that reminds you to breathe easy.
Phil: When the walls come down -
Sarah: when the thunder rumbles -
Both: when nobody else is home, hold my hand -
Phil: and I promise -
Both: I won't let go.
Nobody tells an actor, ‘you’re playing a strong-minded man.’ We assume that men are strong-minded. A strong-minded woman is a different animal.

Meryl Streep, on being told that she often plays “strong-minded women.”

#god had a second child #her name is meryl streep

(via bathcrone)

lisaapisaa:

OHMYGAWD.

Whenever anyone has called me a bitch, I have taken it as a compliment. To me, a bitch is assertive, unapologetic, demanding, intimidating, intelligent, fiercely protective, in control—all very positive attributes. But it’s not supposed to be a compliment, because there’s that old, stupid double standard: When men are aggressive and dominant, they are admired, but when a woman possesses those same qualities, she is dismissed and called a bitch. These days, I strive to be a bitch, because not being one sucks. Not being a bitch means not having your voice heard. Not being a bitch means you agree with all the bullshit. Not being a bitch means you don’t appreciate all the other bitches who have come before you. Not being a bitch means since Eve ate that apple, we will forever have to pay for her bitchiness with complacence, obedience, acceptance, closed eyes, and open legs.
Margaret Cho (via vogueweekend)

Loppy ears flufffyyy bunnies are shooooo cute. EEEEEEEEEE I want! 

wheretheweedstakeroot:

youarenotyou:

[Two smiling people at a table. One is saying “I’m so happy we live in a world without slavery and imperialism.” There are boxes pointing to various objects around and on the people. They read:
COTTON: Picked in Uzbekistan where 2 million children as young as 7 are forced to pick cotton for 3p a kilo.
APPLES: Picked in California by Mexican migrant workers, not being paid minimum wage nor provided housing.
LAPTOP: Made in China by adults working 18 hours a day at 32p an hour. The laptop will end up back in China’s landfills, where children will dismantle it for its valuable metals including lead.
MOBILE PHONE: Gold, tantalum, tin, and tungsten mined in Congo in abysmal working conditions, causing disease and the regional conflict responsible for the deaths of over 5 million people and systematic rape of women.
ORANGE JUICE: Picked in Chile by women working 60 hours a week, below minimum wage.
FACE: Detoxed with Dead Sea salts sourced in occupied West Bank; land stolen by Israel from Palestinians, who are subject to continual and severe human rights violations.
COFFEE: Picked in Guatemala where entire families with children as young as 6 are forced to pick a 100-pound quota in order to get the minimum wage of less than  £2/day
SHIRT: Sewn in India under forced labour conditions by people earning less than 25p an hour, for 16 hours a day, while being unable to send their children to school.
DIAMOND: Mined in Sierra Leone by children as young as 7, working in dangerous conditions for 10p an hour, six days a week.]

this needs a million notes

wheretheweedstakeroot:

youarenotyou:

[Two smiling people at a table. One is saying “I’m so happy we live in a world without slavery and imperialism.” There are boxes pointing to various objects around and on the people. They read:

COTTON: Picked in Uzbekistan where 2 million children as young as 7 are forced to pick cotton for 3p a kilo.

APPLES: Picked in California by Mexican migrant workers, not being paid minimum wage nor provided housing.

LAPTOP: Made in China by adults working 18 hours a day at 32p an hour. The laptop will end up back in China’s landfills, where children will dismantle it for its valuable metals including lead.

MOBILE PHONE: Gold, tantalum, tin, and tungsten mined in Congo in abysmal working conditions, causing disease and the regional conflict responsible for the deaths of over 5 million people and systematic rape of women.

ORANGE JUICE: Picked in Chile by women working 60 hours a week, below minimum wage.

FACE: Detoxed with Dead Sea salts sourced in occupied West Bank; land stolen by Israel from Palestinians, who are subject to continual and severe human rights violations.

COFFEE: Picked in Guatemala where entire families with children as young as 6 are forced to pick a 100-pound quota in order to get the minimum wage of less than  £2/day

SHIRT: Sewn in India under forced labour conditions by people earning less than 25p an hour, for 16 hours a day, while being unable to send their children to school.

DIAMOND: Mined in Sierra Leone by children as young as 7, working in dangerous conditions for 10p an hour, six days a week.]

this needs a million notes

devilscabaret:

The Avengers: Plot

devilscabaret:

The Avengers: Plot